Family.

I guess there is just too much to blog about this particular topic, i'm sure everyone have their own different stories they wanna share. So i've decided to share a little bit of my own family and how they're like, this might make me cry or this might make me smile.

I pretty much assume that everyone have their own story to tell, like how much they're in love with their own family or some might even have a little hatred against them. My part of story is a little messed up, my part of story can be really saddening at times. But no matter how much we've been through all these years, i'll still reflect back on what i've done and what i should change. Cos in the end, family will always be the ones who stays by your side when all else fails.

I came from a broken family, real dad of mine didn't even bother looking back on what craps he has brought into this family. There's just too much things about him i could rant out or hate about, i'm pretty sure no one in the world would wanna have a dad like him cos he is just too shitty in the things he does. Yes, i would love to strangle him and slap him with all my words i wanna say to him. I'm not afraid to tell the world what he has done, he doesn't suit to have a family at all. Moreover, he doesn't deserve to marry my mum in the first place. All he did was cheat on my mum and nothing else. Can you imagine how life was for her? Raising 3 kids on her own and working 2 jobs back then. Just to let you guys know how cruel he is, he ran away with another woman. My parents divorced when i wasn't even born, so take a good look at the picture and tell me how tough it was for me.

I didn't know who my real dad was, i just live each day thinking that the person taking care of my family was my dad. But no, that bastard cheated on my mum as well. Like what the hell seriously, my mum doesn't deserve all these. All those who cheat on her, deserves to be hit by karma. I guess everything was unexpected, she didn't see it coming as well. My childhood was great but at the same time, it wasn't that pleasing to see. No matter how much i wanna change the past, no matter how much i wanna make it better, it doesn't go my way. I can't make it better because i'm no good myself. If i could be mature enough back then, i would wanna make my family happy and united. 

But i guess, its just too late.

1) My mum

She was so called the bread winner for our family, the past years she has been suffering just too much i guess. I can never imagine how i'll be like if i'm in her shoes, i wouldn't be able to survive. My mum is strong, she is just like other mums who nag too much and scold too much. Sometimes we couldn't understand why is she always yelling at the most ridiculous things ever, then i somehow came to realise that she didn't mean it. I assume her past made her this way, i assume she has brought back all the happiness to the future. I'm always talking back to her and screaming so loud at times, but never realise how much it'll hurt. Sometimes i wonder to myself why am i this way, why can't i just be a good girl and listen to her. She doesn't deserve all these, she deserve a better life and i'm gonna give it to her when there is still time.

2) My dad(Step dad)

My step dad came into this family when i was in kindergarten, i guess he really did capture my mum's heart. He gave too much to this family and i'm grateful in whatever he has done. He wasn't like the other guys who cheated on my mum, he was one of a kind and i'm sure God didn't let my mum suffer alone. God put such a great man into this family, how much more can i ask for? We ain't his real kids, but he treated us like his own. He got us whatever we asked for and he didn't complain about it but work his whole life just to get us what we want. Back then we didn't know how he got it, then we slowly realised how much he has to work for it to get us what we wanted. I mean, its just unbelievable to know much he is able to sacrifice for this family. This wouldn't last forever, but i'm holding on to every moment of it.

3) My sisters

Yes yes, the most annoying of all. Siblings can really be a pain the ass sometimes but at the same time, they can also be the ones to hear all your sorrows and pains. Of cos there are many crappy moment we've been through all these years and counting on, but no doubt they're still my one and only sisters i adore so much. There are times i hate them so damn much, and there times i just love them so damn much. Its just a great feeling when we're able to sit down in the kitchen and talk for hours about our own life. Back then its just arguing and fighting over things that are so overly retarded, but now is fighting this sistership and making us more closely bonded. I honestly adore them a lot, just sometimes i feel they couldn't see it though. I wish one day we could hang on together and talk about life that all of us don't know about each other.

Some people might not have a family, some families might be as broken mine. But fear not, cos i'm sure you're never alone. There are still people out there who cares a lot for you, so don't even give on life. I'm in no place to judge all the families, all i can say is, treasure what you have now. Cos when things happen, it'll be too late to say what you want.

Tell your family how much you love them, when they are still around to hear it.