Things not to do when in love.

Hey guys.

Just wanna share a little bit of this and that. Note to everyone that this post doesn't mean that everyone should agree to it. I'm just stating a few points to what i have experienced before so do not take it personally unless you feel that you are one of them and you should obviously feel guilty about it.

I am not a love guru, maybe a little. But i don't know why people come to me for advices everytime and i enjoy giving them lectures for many hours. True enough, we could tell people the rights and wrongs about a situation but couldn't at all adopt it on ourselves. That is the reason why we can never learn on our own and can only depend on our problems or people to give us the knowledge we never had. If you know me well enough, i suck at loving most of time. I do not know how to express the slightest things ever cos i'm just that stupid when it comes to love and many people just kept asking me why when i do not know the answers at all. Probably that's one of the reason why so many people come and go in my life, only the ones who understands me or the one who is like me would stay the longest. That's a sad thing actually, i'm being misunderstood most of the time.

But of cos, i have my own experiences as well. And surely i say to you, when love starts crumbling down, you know you gotta start putting on the armour you have left collecting dust in the closet. Some things that people do would just hurt you and you're left there wondering if you could still stand up and survive or leave there to die. Sometimes love could be so overwhelming that people forgot about themselves and when that person walks away, your happiness goes away with them as well. What could you do? Nothing.

Here are some of the things that one should not do when in love(from experience) :

1) Being affected by how he/she feels.

I know it sucks when the one you love is feeling all down and miserable. And the only thing in your head right at that point of time is finding something to cheer them up no matter how silly you'll look infront of them, because their happiness is what matters to you the most. The last thing to do during this period is not to feel the same way as them. When one is weak, another gotta be strong. No matter how hurtful you feel cos of their pain, do not fall into the same pain as well because it'll make everything so much worse and no one will feel better in the end. If they do not want to explain why they are feeling this way, give them some time. Do something to cheer them up and make them smile again, not cave into sober and assume everything is your fault just because he/she is feeling miserable. They could be having a bad day at work/school, maybe they just argued with someone, or maybe its just one of those days where people breakdown for no reason because its all part of life. Whatever it is, never assume that it is all because of you. If you assume that every emotion he/she gives is all because of you, you're obviously stirring your own shit up.

2) 'Go find someone else then.'

When one is angry, nothing goes through their minds. All that they could feel is flames burning inside of them and nothing could extinguish it because they are that angry. But it doesn't give you the reason to use it anyways. Asking them to go find someone else and pushing them away to another person just because you are pissed at them for whatever reason. I admit i have used this before and i regretted it because at that point of time, i was basically stupid in love and know no cure for it. Some of you might be using this for attention many times. But trust me, everyone got their own limits and when you cross that limit, you know you can never undo what you've said or done. Just because they have stayed through with you everytime you blurt the same thing, doesn't mean they'll stay through with you forever just because you know they have always not leave you when you say those words. One day, one fine day they will do what you ask for so don't ever regret when you end up seeing them with someone else. Don't underestimate what you thought someone could never do just because they didn't do it before, they will do it so don't fucking regret it dear.

3) Never assume everything is you.

Everyone got their own free will to tweet or post about whatever they want, its not up to you to decide what they should post because people need to let off some steam and feel better as well. When he/she tweets or post about something emotional or angry, last thing to do is to feel personal over it. They could be ranting cos of someone who made them this way or a problem which screwed up their day. Just because it feels like its talking about you, it doesn't means is really about you! If you wanna know the truth, start asking because you can. And when they tell you is not about you, just accept the damn fact and move on. Stop trying to indirectly reply their tweets or post thinking that they can't see it when obviously, they can. When shit like this happens, i can only roll my eyes backwards hoping that my eyeballs would not roll back. If you got your bad days, everyone else have it as well. So calm the fuck down and start asking instead of thinking everything is about you.

4) 'You can leave if you want.'

Some people thought that breaking up is a fucking game. It is too mainstream that it is used during every fight, i clearly do not know how this would work. When a problem between a couple arise, be mature and listen to whatever problems it is. Not trying to use the word 'breakup' just to end off the situation because you are left with nothing to defend yourself with. If you think the word 'breakup' could scare the shit out of the other party and letting yourself think that they will surrender the fight, then think again. Not everyone you want to break up with will stay and beg you to not leave. You'll never know how it will end off, you'll never know if over will really be over. Learn to listen and ask, not telling someone that they can leave if they want to because you assume they are miserable being with you when that's clearly not the case. What do you take them of? After a fight, and you giving them an option whether to leave or stay. Some people do not give up on love that easily, so do not make them look like a fool letting everyone else think that he/she gives up too easily like some easy ass person with no feelings. If one day they really leave, don't freakin' cry out to God and beg for mercy.

5) Scolding of foul languages 

If you love someone, you tend to tease them the most. But always know that there are limits to everything. Just because some are willing to accept whatever shit you give to them, it doesn't apply to  the whole population. You can tease them with cute and silly UNOFFENDED words which would cost them to love you even more. Not always using stupid foul languages on them just because its fun for you. I despise people who often use vulgars on their girlfriends or boyfriends whether if its for fun , joy or laughter or when they are angry. It is a major turn off when vulgars are used on me and said by the ones i love the most. Calm the fuck down because i'm not a foul language dictionary for you to write on. It doesn't only applies to me, but everyone deserves to be treated better when in a relationship or when in love. Spouting vulgars at the one you love is never a cool gesture, it is a simple act of childishness and lameness which could lead you to a fucking war.